A few years ago I fell out with all my housemates, it was a really tough time and I was going through PTSD.
I told my boyfriend at the time about what was happening, this is how the convo went: “See, that’s why I don’t trust people”
“Just because there a few bad eggs doesn’t mean the whole world is bad.”
“Don’t worry, one day someone will screw you over so badly that you’ll become skeptics like the rest of us”
It was the most upsetting sentence anyone has ever said to me. To this day it still makes me sad that someone, anyone, can think this way about the world. “Well I think it would be incredibly unfair if I treated everyone with mistrust because one time, three people were mean. It wouldn’t be fair to the new people I meet”
Now, I wouldn’t have said what I said. I don’t believe in bad eggs, I don’t believe in bad people. I believe that there are hurt people who do bad behaviours. People are not their behaviour.
For me to believe in this, first of all, i need to treat others the way I would want to be treated. Second of all, I need to look for the good.
When I lost my wallet and someone turned it in, I didn’t think it was lucky, I thought “that’s good people for you”. When I fell in the street and a few people stopped to help me up, I thought “that’s good people for you”. When I locked myself out and my neighbour (who I had never met) let me sit in their apartment while I waited for a key, I thought “that’s good people for you”. It’s not always easy to believe in the good in the world especially when it can’t always be seen but even if you can’t see it in this moment, know that those people are there!