Do You Feel Like You’ve Wasted Time?

July 7, 2018

When people come out of hospital, there is this overwhelming feeling of wasted time. The world has moved on whilst your world has stayed still.
The same happens with mental illness.
But I keep thinking about this concept and realising how truly bullshit it is. There is no such thing as wasted time. I’ve used the phrase “wasted energy” a lot too. But no, not really. I spoke about wasting energy on trolls the other day but I had fun so it’s not a waste. Last night I was talking about whether a relationship is a waste if it ends, but it’s not. That love existed. I learnt from that love. And it’s guided what I expect in romantic relationships and I know better BECAUSE of those experiences.
Everything teaches you something. Life is not a race in which you compete with someone else. Yes, it sucks that your life comes to a standstill, when you’ve had no choice but is it really a standstill?
Every hospitalisation, I have grown infinitely because I had no other choice but to detach from every part of my identity, whether it be my appearance or my ability to walk/eat.
Nothing is a waste unless you define it as such. If you take nothing away from an experience, that waste is on you.